On the job with Nuki
April 25th, 2007I note with some alarm that, according to that august record of life’s giddy goings on – the Times – Japanese firms are encouraging their employees to take up homeworking. Why? Because of the low birth rate! The implications can only be imagined.
Would any work ever get done? Who would be “homeworking” with whom? Will this initiative risk sullying the good name of homeworking? What if the kids catch on? (“Just bringing Nuki back for some homeworking Mum!”) Will this dramatically increase the number of people homeworking? Will the Japanese take up eating massive marshmallows for lunch – to keep their strength up?
Most alarming of all: will it catch on here in good old Blighty, where we too have a lowering birth rate. I can just see it: “Yes, Mr Jones, the proposal seems fine – yes!, yes!, yes! – I just wanted to discuss some of the finer points with you – Oh, yes!!!!, yes!!!!! – Mr Jones. Yes, that’s right Mr Jones, I’m homeworking.”
Will we all start looking forward to going in to head office, just to get a rest? What effect will this new trend have on the design of home office furniture? Will my black leather command post be water-filled in future? We can probably look forward to huge LED displays on the ceiling, showing the latest sales figures or HR’s new scheme for avoiding redundancy payments. It brings fully up to date the concept of “Music While You Work”, that famously popular radio programme from the 40s, except it will be “Multiplication While You Work”.
Please don’t tell anyone – it might catch on!